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is it love or no?
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is it love or no?
Posted in 
is it love or no?
hey guys wats up? i got a prob i need advice or help on, either one. i met a guy on this site and we have been talkin for a while. but my mom found out last week about him. she wasnt mad or anything but she told me that since hes 23 and im 17 that hes a pred and she can press charges against him. But she doesnt want to b/c hes my friend. i had to tell him this and i feel soooo bad that i had to tell him that we couldnt talk anymore. I hurt alot because im afraid of the pain i caused him. he and i liked each other alot. so wat can i do to convince my mom to let me still talk to him or is my mom right? plz help. thnx.
gee thanx. i kno its funny but its serious to me. so plz dont make it any worse.
What is a pred? Why do you believe she can press charges against, and more to the point why would she want to? Although parents' advice is sometimes useful, sometimes they want what pleases them and not you. Only you know your mom and how much to trust her.

There are two sides to the argument here. Firstly, at 17 you are pretty much an adult. In England it is possible to leave home at 16 and make your own decisions - not often a wise or popular choice, but it is allowed. On the other side of the coin you are talking about someone on the internet. 6 years is not such a bad age gap for someone you have met and fallen for, but you have no idea about who this person really is. All the bad possibilities aside (people can create false identities, you do the math), internet relationships tend to be more hyped up and usually the magic goes the moment you meet someone.
agree with beppe on age etc and decisions.
disagree with internet relationship part.
if you meet right person, meet many times then anything is possible. if you live in different countries, my advice is


aint gonna work.

you make your own happiness, anything is possible if you want it.
as for false identities.....

IM  brain surgeon who used to fly concordes, lol
well ha na d i are in diferent countries. hes in south africa and im in the u.s. but we like each other alot. my mom only wants wats best of me. she said she was sory but she didnt want to see me get hurt. thanx guys for ur advice.
she cant press charges about you talking to someone...and i dont think the police are going to go to south africa to sort it out:p
Like Beppe said, what on earth is a "pred"? :|
I think "Pred" might mean a "Predator" . Some one (older Pedo)who grooms young kids with false ID + false promises,in the hope of eventually meeting up with young kid,,,,,,,,,,,,

I'm not saying your a young kid watergirl,just saying what I think, your Mom might be thinking.

Anyway,your MoM isnt doing this to hurt you,only to protect you.
PMSL!!!!!!!!!!!!! :p

when u get to be 18.. maybe you can go to south africa???

your mum cant press charges unless hes sent you p**n of himself even then proply not as for cyber i dont know if thats illegal or not.its your life do what you want your mum will still love you in the end
i would be very carefull if i was you, there are soooo many weirdos on here!!!  he might be married? he might want to meet you, and who knows if he will be alone when you meet!! why dont you go and find a REAL guy, not a cyber guy ...lmao
well i have been thinkin about those facts of him bein a weirdo and all... but he hasnt sent me any "naughty" pics of himself, he isnt married, and he doesnt cyber at all and neither do i. i have been thinkin of him alot but i thank u all for replyin. keep the advice comin.
yeah hes right might be a weirdo when i was in highschool that going back like 4years i was in a schoolchat room and i had a 13year old kid chatting me up pretending to be a girl.lucky you can tell which computer there on.have you even seen a picture of this guy???.he might not be interested just some guy looking for a 1night stand or maybe he'd try to r@pe you never know.just becareful not everyone is as kind or honest as you or me.
well im glad that u at least gave me some insight, all of u. i have seen pics of him, and i even looked up his profile. but yeah i do wish that some people were kind and honest like me and whiteghost. so thnx whiteghost.
your welcome bloodywatergrl.ppl dont spam lol
well does any more people have any advice or anything. plz dont insult me or call me stupid because im in a crisis at the moment.
Back to my original question - What is a pred?
You have no idea if he is single, Is he REALLY in South Africa?  Is he really the age he says?  Is he even a man?  
There are many more questions but remember on the internet you can never be sure.  There are a ton of people who prey on the trusting.  
You really have no way to know.  Run away as fast as you can!
bloodygirl, the person you're talking about he doesn't happen to use the screenname majestic62, does he?
my advice is go get something real, never trust the net
no his screenname is sever8. well i know that there are preds but how many times do i have to say that we have been talkin for quite a while, weve seen true pics of each other, and weve looked up each others background. he doesnt know where i live and all.. but yeah. well maybe im just bein stubborn. keep the advice comin.
no his screenname is sever8. well i know that there are preds but how many times do i have to say that we have been talkin for quite a while, weve seen true pics of each other, and weve looked up each others background. he doesnt know where i live and all.. but yeah. well maybe im just bein stubborn. keep the advice comin. p.s.
pred= predator.
You wrote: Well i know that there are preds but HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY that we have been talkin for quite a while, weve seen true pics of each other, and weve looked up each others background. KEEP THE ADVICE COMIN.


i wasnt advice on how to tell my mom about how i still wanna talk to him. thats all im askin doozer so plz stop makin me feel like crap. plz.
So you basically want to know HOW to tell your mom that you still want to talk to this man. That's all you want advice on.

There is no how in the matter. Your mother is fully aware of the situation as is. So the only thing you can do is communicate with her. Walk up to her, sit down with her, whatever...and tell her what you want. You are 17 and want to be an adult by pursuing this relationship, then act like one or you can hide in some fear behind your mom just because you can't express your desires with her. I have to side with your mother though. I wouldn't expect the conversation to pleasent. But as a "woman" you have to do what you want to do in life now. But be prepared, this can all kick you in your a$$ and you might end up crawling back to mommy when you realize she was right. Although, I hope that won't be the case.

Why don't you just tell her that you still want to talk to her. Communication is the key to everything.
bloodywatergrl you should post a picture of yourself
why shuld i post a pic of myself. im not scared to talk to my mom its just i dont know how to  tell her that i still wanna talk to him and shes gonna ask all these quewstions than say that im being stupid. how can  i just tell her.
all right doozer. thnx for at least not criticizing me. ill just plain out tell her i guess.
I'm not trying to sound insensitivty about that matter.

But I am a blunt person. And when it comes to serious subject matters in relationships (family, friends, personal, etc) people don't just talk anymore. They always think about how and worry about the other person's reaction. The only way to know how to handle it and what the next worries will be is to dive into it and not Bullsh!t around the issue. And remember there is a difference between talking (actually communicating) and yelling and figting to make points. Just try to be sensitive to your mother and understanding. Hopefully she will do the same for you. Anyway good luck. 

Are you a 110% sure about this guy? The chances that he is the real thing could be slim to none. You are only 17 and have a whole life ahead of you and don't need the drama in my opinion.
You can't press charges what as police wont go to south africa what you going to do call the A-Team :p
your a teenage girl your not stupid just confused all teenagers are.i was a teenager once i even had a teenage girlfriend now teenage girlfriends are confusing.they dont know what they want and men dont know what they want.goodluck in however you go about it.
i was gonna tell her on friday, but then she brought up the subject to my grandma and said good thing britt got rid of him. i felt hurt and i felt like i had betrayed my mom a bit because of me still wanting to talk to him. she then said that she woudl die if sumthing happened to me. i fell really bad now. i want to talk to the guy still but i wanna please my mom too. wat now?

talk to the guy and dont tell your mum:)

dont trust online people. many people in the internet are fake. for all you know that dude could be a pedophile....
too many liars in the internet...dont give your heart to someone over the internet who might be a predator who has a history of stalking and tricking teenage girls into having cybering with him.

not saying he's a predator though.... just saying be careful. your choice though.....too many fake identities and too many people with multiple personality disorders in the internet....be careful.....

what quick draw described is a prime example of herself:)
you're obviously trying to attack me. yet i give good advice to the person above. please, continue to show your true colors beppe.

I am the prime example of multiple personality disorder - not only am I able to post from two different ids, but from two different continents as well!

Beppe "Hara" Peter01-27PokeyDokeyDie.REAL.samFISHsparkyquickballs (you can call me MaxnishstezzOPERATORiac for short)
shut up. you aren't convincing anyone here except the fake usernames that you control. shut up.
well im still stuck as to wat to do>

again, the first post i made was advice to bloodywatergirl. yet Hara attacked me, and then you decided to attack me. you Hara "Beppe" Kiri are obviously the one person intitiating the attacks. 

And that's what I'm trying to tell the Moderators to be aware of. It's not just in this thread, it's in most of the threads you post in. It's a pattern and you're getting away with it.

You're a LIAR and if you continue to get away with your moronic flaming attitude, the more that REAL LIFE will catch up to you and give you exactly what you deserve you liar, you coward.
It's just a guy on the internet. Ask your mom to listen before she replies. Tell her that you understand the dangers of the internet, and that you just want to chat to him as an online friend. Tell her that you realise a long-distance internet relationship is pointless (not always true, but mostly), and that you are never going to give this guy personal or traceable details (anonymous email is fine). Mean it as well. Reassure her that you are not going to talk dirty, or ever mention a relationship to each other. Try to mean that as well. Then ask her how she feels about this, and if she trusts your ability to stay sensible.

If she says yes, show her that you value her trust - and don't push it with this guy.

If she says absolutely not, tell her how disappointed you are with her - but that you value your relationship with her more than with a stranger on the internet. Tell your friend that your mom is more important to you and that you don't want to upset her, so you can't contact him anymore. If he is a good person he'll understand and stop talking to you (if not, there is a sign that your mom is right).

If you don't like your mom, then that's a different story. I can't really advise you if that is the case, because I don't know either of you or the reasons why you might not like each other.
you can say anything on the net.im 7'2 muscular build with an iq of 380 and a bank accout of $400billion.( go ahead prove me wrong lol).thats my point
>you can say anything on the net.

You can also tell the truth, and believe it or not some people do.

Can someone remove this moron from the forums permanently please?
if only if only..still we must suffer:D 

will make the day she finally leaves much more enjoyable...
>>will make the day she finally leaves much more enjoyable...

Hara, she gets off on thinking she's clever. If she is anything like the same in real life, then she's never going to leave - this forum is probably all she has. She probably sees us as her best friends because we 
 talk back :O
He might be lying,
He might be honest,

Bottom line hes 6 years older and 1000's of miles away.

Your 17, I'm sure you could walk around the block and meet at least 3 guys on your way.

Internet is for for friendships not relationships.

Snipe says No

Disclaimer: This is an OPINON meaning it may diffrent from your OPINON

PS QuickDraw does posting in this topic make me Beppe, I need to know for tax reasons.
Very interesting topic so I just have to make my own input.

First of all, what is love?  Van Halen sang about it.  The song goes: "How do you know if it's love, it is love if it last forever..."

I know that line doesn't help much in defining love.  So let's just forget about that song for now.

Let's move from a different direction.  Parents, especially good parents, are especially interested in the future of their children.  So if they say something is bad for you, then it probably is.  And if you are a minor according to the law of your state or country, then you should definitely listen to your good parents.  Well, it's all totally different if your parents are bad.  But most parents are good.

Then one day, you will no longer be a minor but an adult.  Then you will face the real challenge of life, and you will no longer always have your parents to bail you out of every difficult situation.  So in a way, being a minor is a time to practice making the right decisions when you're not yet considered an adult by law.

keep away from these ppl they just wanna use you to get married and get a british passport go out a find a fella not some one on the internet 

well i talked to him yesterday on my contact list on msn and i told him we couldnt talk anymore for a while. he said ok, he understood how my parents felt, and that he also had a gf who is a good friend of ours so yeah...well i still hurt tho.
Bloody. He has/had a girlfriend that is a good friend of both of you? That right there is already a mess in itself. Geesh. 
NO not like that. well he and i had started talkin the first week of summer, i got grounded from my computer forthe summer i talked to him tuseday. he told me he had a gf now because he thought i was gone from him forever. but he told me about her and that she wants to be friends with me too. so thats the story.
i think thats so sad lmao how long did you nkow him an hour?
no for about 4 weeks thank u very much (sarcastic tone).
how long do u kno ur people before u dump them, an hour?
i didnt think so.
So, I don't get it what does he want now a threesome? 

The guy is a loser. He obviously did not invest much feeling for you to just turn around and "see" someone else.

4 weeks of online dating. Um. Not a whole lot of time. I thought you were talking with the guy for like 6 months or something, so that you could actually get to know him. 

I dont understand some kids today.
well ill never understand older people. well he was single wen we started talkin. then i was gone for 4 months. i got back on and found out that he was upset and that he had found a new gf. but he says hell probably break up with her soon.
i dont  date girls i meet online.i did lose my virginity to a girl id only known for a month but she got me drunk and then took me to the bedroom thats all im saying about that.you just dont know who you can trust online these days.
oh thats weird. i go online just to meet new people and make new friends, but then u got those people that u talk to for a while and u two start to like each other. I am usually the one that gets hit on by other players.
well thanx everyone for replyin on this topic. ive gotten over him. but ill still wanna be friends with him. thanx again for the advice, eye opening opinions and so on.
the point is i slept with some woman that i hardly knew and didnt love cause i was drunk.
Why are you telling everyone this?
y dont u have any respect for another persons thougths and feelings beppe? ghost, its ok. i wouldnt blame u if u didnt luv cuz she probablt just used u. i have never had sex, yet. so everytime sumone tries to pull it off with me, i just get down right hissy about it. dont think about the grl anymore, unless shes spreadin the word that u did do it with her.
You don't have to be so sensitive about almost everything which is said to you. I wasn't even talking to you, and when I have I haven't said anything other than to give you honest advice. Some guy who you happen to like starts talking about having s3x in a gaming forum and you talk me down for asking why? You need to be less snappy and start working on inter-personality skills. At some point or another you have talked down at most of the people who have taken time to give you their honest opinions.
I was thinking of doing a best of BWG compilation...
Suit I did a great post of quotes from BWG, it was deleted though. I think I made it to prove a point to you actually. Some of the ones on ghosts were hilarious. Also when someone copied her nick:p.
Bloodywatergrl there is no need to take offence from what anyone writes on here. Just have a laugh along with the rest of us, and realise your a comedy genius.
I remeber your BWG post quotes! Such a shame it was deleted...

I leave you with this:

"but yeah i do wish that some people were kind and honest like me and whiteghost. so thnx whiteghost."
hey my name is brittany a.k.a redneck queen. Im a newbie since saturday, so yeah...well if u wanna chat or challenge me sumtime, let me kno, k? a little bit about myself: 16/f/michigan, i uv rock music especially submersd and seether, i like anything wicked, i like anything that has to do with water and yinyangs. so if u wanna do watever, let me kno. my email is bootcamp03@msn.com. hope to ttyl. c-ya

watergrl No...He probally doesnt like u :$ LMFAO he used u. And why are you dating online? Are you that sad??? Probally so...LOL.

I m kobe i win 12 championships and 3rd place copa tanx 05;\
its not worth it to love a guy you dont know in real life try getting some boyfriend that lives near you and not someone that lives 5000 miles away from you lol
lmao it's not love IT'S SAD net dating lol pathetic is what i call it get a life plz. ;\

Beware of internet relationships...

Beware of internet relationships...

Beware of internet relationships...

Beware of internet relationships...
OKay so if u can't have a boyfriend, then i'll be ur best friend bloodywater. Meet me in blitz room 1 if u wanna be friends.

                                            Chess Bot500
Hiya bloodysweet.

I had read all comments in ur topic. Im not sure if u mean me.
I was gone for long time out of forum. 
How r you ?